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Name's Kayla| I live in Washington state, hi.
Stale Pretzels

psyducker:

do u ever lie on ur side and a small tear leaks out and ur just like whoa wtf body I know I’m sad but not that sad

waerlogas:

i may seem like an angry person on the surface but deep inside im actually angrier

artist-chan:

optimussentinel:

ur-supposed-to-say-jerk:

thepizzakitty:

i hate pants that make it look like i have a boner when i sit but then i remember im a girl but i still worry that somebody will think i have a boner

SOMEONE UNDERSTANDS

Do… Girls really worry about this?

yes

sadstagram:

which is messier my life or my hair

 Anonymous: What's the most illegal thing you ever did?

sephyerite:

almanzapedia:

At Stanford there was this Professor who was a total bitch and she taught British Literature, which was cool. Except she taught only her opinions of the books and it didn’t help me as a writer. I went to school to learn new things to improve my craft, not have someone else’s opinions carved onto my forehead.

So anyway, for our final project, she asked us to write a ten page paper on why the color symbolism in Othello was so significant. I did some research and it turned out that she did her entire graduate thesis on this very subject. I was mad. This wasn’t teaching, this was boosting her ego. SO I wrote a ten page essay on why color symbolism in Othello wasn’t significant, satirizing it to the point of no return, saying that her opinion was an opinion and shouldn’t be taken seriously.

SHe failed me, needless to say. So in retaliation, I responded by baking a batch of brownies laced with weed and laxatives and delivered them myself to the professor hours before her big graduation speech. I told her that it was a peace offering, my way of apologizing and asking if I could do anything to fix my grade.

She refused to fix my grade.

In the end, she shit herself on stage.

I didn’t regret it.

No mercy.

sobermotherfuckinggamzee:

"I’m gonna do it. I’m gonna kill the human."
"BILLY NO"
  • me: walks into living room
  • tv: tonight on how its made
  • me: stands in same spot for 30 minutes watching how garbage bags are made
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